It is 5:20 AM in good, (c)old London. Outside my window the blackness of the morning is dispersed by street lights and the headlights of cars and buses going up and down the street. At this very moment there are millions upon millions of people preparing to go about their day and for some of them (quite a lot of them) this day will be their last. Even as I type this I realize that I might be one of ‘them’ (I hope not) and it’s quite chilling to write that but I guess this is the point of this particular post. Between the helicopter that crashed into that pub in Glasgow and Paul Walker’s death, I can’t help but ponder on how random and unexpected death often is.
Beyonce is encouraging me through my headphones to leave my mark on this world and I can’t help think about this moment and about all the moments I have left. As much as we hate to think about it, Death is waiting … for everyone. He doesn’t respect gender, race, wealth or frankly, good timing. He stands outside the door of our lives and he is unbuckling his shoes waiting for the time when he can walk in.
So the question is what do I do with the moments in between this breath and my last? What do you do between that breath (yeah, the one you just took 🙂 ) and your last. Life is finite. Yet, we don’t often think of it in that manner. Trust me the Days of Our Lives has been trying to tell us for decades that life slowly runs out, “Like sand through the hourglass so are the days of our lives”… and although on some basic level we know this – we rarely act like it. I’m not encouraging anyone to YOLO (you only live once) because although that’s quite true I think Drake forgot the rest YOLOWTC (you only live once with the consequences). But… with consequences in mind the fact that we only have a finite amount of time to make our mark on this world and to live the life we want, we need to stop dreaming and start living. I spend a lot of time with my head in the clouds (they’ve granted me indefinite leave to remain); lots and lots of time thinking of what I want to achieve and how I plan to get there that at times I forget about this moment, these moments. And trust me at the end of the day all these moments add up. It’s about finding the balance.
If you’ve had four New Years Resolutions that you would: lose weight, go further in your career, get that damn book published (this is for me :D),, tell that guy / girl you’re attracted them, be more consistent, be kinder to yourself … to everyone else, go skinny dipping or whatever it might have been, it is time to realize that you have four less years to achieve them. I’m not saying that there won’t be disappointments. To lose the weight you’d probably have to give up your sushi addiction (and by you, I mean me ;)) and to get that book published there will probably be quite a few rejection slips along the way. That person mightn’t feel that chemical reaction :P, but that’s fine… five years from now you might realize in true Beyonce style that they were the best thing you’ve never had. But, there’s a lot to be said about putting yourself out there… the bruises that you might get and all!
When Death finally steps through my door (and, I hope it is a long, long, long, long time from now … but who knows, really?) I want to be able to go without thinking of all the things I wished I did. I want to be able to be happy and grateful for all the things I’ve done. Then, well, I want to punch him straight in the face. So it’s about time for me to start doing everything I can to make that happen. How about you?